MY PAINS Part 85
When i got to his parent’s house i knocked on the gate, the gateman answered looking at me through
the pin hole of the gate.
“Who do you want to see?” The gateman asked.
I’m here to see Alajah, i said.
“What’s your name?” He asked me.
I told him my name.
“Wait, let me go and inform her.”
He came back, and said she’s coming.
Few minutes later, the gateman opened the gate and she walked out.
“Ki le fe?” (What do you want?) She asked me with angrily.
Good morning ma, i greeted her.
“(Metchew), she hissed. What do you want in my house? You want to kill me now? O fe pa mi, abi?
Tears filled my eyes.
I’m here for my son, i said to her.
“Ohhhhh, so you can kill me also. You had better get away from here right now!” She yelled at me with
I’m not going anywhere until i see my son, i said, as tears were rolling down my face.
“Get away from here and never you step your feet here again! Never!” She shouted at me angrily.
She went in and closed the gate.
“Lock my gate now! And never you open it for her again! Sho ti gbo? (Have you heard?) She said to the
“E ma bi nu ma.( Don’t be angry ma.) Mo ti gbo ma. (I have heard you ma.)
I heard the gateman lock the gate immediately.
“Nonsense”, she said and hissed.
I kept on hitting the gate pleading for the gateman to open the gate but he didn’t.
“I’m sorry i can’t, she instructed me not to”, the gateman said.
I still kept on hitting the gate, pleading and shedding tears.
The gateman didn’t open the gate.
I sat down and rested my back on the gate, crying in pains.
Johnson, Johnson, Johnson, i said, as i was crying.
After a while i summoned on courage and got up. I started hitting the gate harder, shouting ‘Johnson’.
I kept on hitting the gate harder, but no one answered.
I cried out. I wished i could just see my son. I felt totally heart broken. I kept on crying till i got home.
The next day.
I didn’t give up, i was desperate to see my son.
I got to her house and knocked on the gate.
“Who is there?” The gateman asked.
I kept mute.
“Haa! I’m sorry i can’t open the gate for you.”
Please, i am here to see my son, ple….ase…. i pleaded.
He didn’t say a word.
I started hitting the gate with my two hands, pleading and shedding tears.
Few minutes later.
“Didn’t i worn you yesterday never to step your feet here again! I can see you are proving stubborn. You
want to succeed in killing my own grandson with that religion of yours. You have failed! Go and tell them
you have failed o”, i heard his mom say, from inside.
My son, my son, please, i said as tears kept on rolling down my face.
The gateman opened the gate and she walked out.
“You can never get him back. Get out away from here!” She shouted at me angrily.
I kept on pleading, as she was shouting at me angrily.
“Shut up now! Get away! You can’t have Ahmed back. I think i have been talking too much.”
I knew no matter how hard i tried she won’t let me see my son so i went on my kneels, in tears.
Please, just let me see him today. I promise not to come here again as you have said.
“(Metchew), she hissed. You cant see him, stop wasting your time. Get away from my house!”
I still kept on pleading on my kneels, crying.
“I have been talking too much like i said. I can see you don’t want to get out from here. You think i am
joking here. You had better leave here now, unless you will regret it”, she said angrily, and walked in.
The gateman locked the gate immediately.
I still kept on pleading, and hitting the gateman.
“Please, my son. Please ….. “,I pleaded, crying.
“You don’t want to leave! After today you won’t step your feet here again”, i heard his mom say.
“Please, my son, please, i still kept on pleading, hitting the gate.
I wondered if his dad was at home or not. Although, he travels a lot due to his work.
I didn’t stop.
Almost an hour later.
Three guys approached me, one of them held my hand immediately, he pulled me away from the gate
and pushed me, i fell on the ground. I felt pains in my rib and my arm, i cried out in pains. They warned
me never to disturb her, if not they would do worst to me. They left immediately.
They street is a quite place, people hardly passed by.
I laid on the ground crying in pains, i couldn’t get up due to the serious pains i was feeling in my rib and
my arm. I raised my head up a bit i saw blood flowing from my hand, i saw seriously injured.
After some few minutes, i tried to get up but i couldn’t. I tried up to five times before i managed to get
up in pains. I managed to walk little by little in pains before i saw a bike and stopped it. The bike rode
me to the bus stop, i boarded a cab to go home. I couldn’t stop crying.
I got home still in pains, holding Ibrahim’s and Jonson’s picture, crying.
“Ibrahim, why did you go? Why? If you didn’t all this won’t be happening right now, why?” I cried out.
I felt the pains increasing the more, i knew i had to go the hospital. I took my purse from my bag that
was close to me. I managed to walk outside the gate. I wanted to take a step when i felt a very sharp
pain in my rib. I screamed out in pains. A woman that lives in the Estate, came to my rescue and rushed
me to the hospital.
To be continued
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© PRINCESS MOTUNRAYO DUROJAIYE
When i was completely healed, i didn’t still give up. I wanted my son back.
When i got there again the gate was locked with a padlock which meant no one was in. I waited for
hours but no one came till i left.
The next day.
I went again, to my surprise i saw two army men at the gate with a gun in their hands, their faces were
looking so mean.
They asked me who i wanted to see, i told them, they said they can’t let me in.
They warned me not to near the gate, fear gripped me.
I kept on pleading, but they didn’t say a word they stood still with their mean faces.
“It’s like someone must have told her i came here yesterday”, i thought to myself, as tears kept on
rolling down my face, as i kept on pleading for them to let me in to see my son.
I kept on pleading and pleading on that day, but they didn’t let me in. I feared to go closer to the gate,
because i was scared of what they might do to me, their faces showed no mercy at all.
I left on that day, crying.
I went four times again, but i wasn’t allowed in no matter how hard i tried.
I sent a text message to her saying….
Please ma, please just let me see my son, i don’t mind converting into a full muslim, i will. I’m willingly to do that. Please ma, please, i am sorry, have mercy on me.
I cried in pains as I typed each word. She replied me saying………
Don’t you ever text me again, it’s too late now.
I kept on sending messages to her but she didn’t reply me again.
I summoned on courage to call her, but she didn’t answer. I still kept on sending texts pleading, and
calling her till she blocked my number from contacting her.
I cried out the more in pains.
“Lord, why is my pains meant to be increasing day by day? What did i do to deserve all this pains i am
through?”, i said in my mind, crying.
When i knew there was no way i could get my son back, i started praying to God to touch her mind to
bring Johnson back to me. I knew Johnson would have missed me so much.
Ibrahim’s death was still a hard on me, i was just managing to be strong. Losing someone you love isn’t
an easy thing to get over at all, almost every second i couldn’t stop thinking of him and crying.
One night i was on my bed shedding tears in pains. My phone rang, kazeem was the one calling.
Kazeem: Hello, Good evening. Ba wo ni?
Me: I’m not okay at all, Kazeem i am not.
Kazeem: (He sighed.)
He apologized for not coming to see me, he said he had not being in Lagos for months.
Kazeem: E jhor, e ma bi nu. (Please, don’t be angry.)
Me: mi bi nu.
I told him how Johnson was taken away for me, i told him how i had been trying to get him, i told him
everything she did. Kazeem, felt pity for me on the phone, he said he would come the next day,and
things will be sorted out, and Johnson would be back.
We talked on the phone for more than 30mintues before he hanged up.
The next day, Kazeem arrived, i asked him if he had seen Johnson.
“(He sighed), i haven’t seen him, you are the first person i am coming to see. I told you i just arrived
Lagos yesterday”, Kazeem said.
I nodded my head , in tears.
He looked at Ibrahim’s picture that was on the wall.
“So sad he is gone, may he rest in perfect peace, Kazeem said.
More than sad, i said as tears rolled down my face.
I started crying in pains.
“It’s well don’t cry all will be well”, he said as he was petting me not to cry.
Now, i can’t even get to see my son also, i said, as i was crying.
He told me not to cry, that he will try his best to talk to his Aunty, to bring back my son to him.
I was quite happy he was around at that time, he was cheering me up, and encouraging me that Johnson
will be back.
Later in the evening he went in to the kitchen to prepare food for both of us.
“Kazeem, is such a good person. I wonder why he hasn’t gotten married up till now”, i thought to myself
as we were talking.
“I’m happy, at least you ate better, than in the morning”, Kazeem said.
I forced a smile on my face.
I asked him why he hadn’t gotten married, he said the lady he was supposed to settle down with, left
him for another man, and a lot of ladies had been disappointing him. I really felt for him, i told him not
to give up that God will grant him a good woman.
“I hope so”, Kazeem said, sadly.
Yes, God will, i replied him.
In the night around 8:00pm, i was in my room when Kazeem knocked on my door.
Come in, i said.
He opened the door, and walked in.
“I’m sorry for disturbing you”, kazeem said.
No, you are not disturbing me na, i said.
“Alright, if you say so. Anyway, i got oranges on my way coming, i forgot to bring it out earlier. Guess,
you will like some.”
Wow, thank you. I love oranges a lot.
“You are welcome”, he replied.
I took the oranges from him, i went to the kitchen to wash it, when i was done i put it in a tray with a
knife beside it, and i walked up to the room.
I hope i didn’t waste time, i said, immediately i opened the door, and walked in.
“Not at all.”
Thanks, i said.
“You don’t need to”, he replied.
If you say so, i said to him.
I pulled the center table in the room close to bed, and i placed the tray on the table. I cut the oranges
into halves i gave him one, and i took one.
As we were sucking the orange, and talking, my mind flashed to Ibrahim and the good times we shared
together. I was looking at his picture on my bed. Kazeem, noticed my mood had changed.
“All is well, may his soul rest in peace”, Kazeem said.
All can never be well, i miss him so much, i said, as tears flowed down my face.
“You have to be strong, you have to be a strong woman for your son, Ahmed”, he said, as he was petting
After a while, he said…
“I have to go now. Goodnight, and sweet dreams.”
Good night, i said.
“See you tomorrow morning”, he said, and left.
When he left i walked in to the bathroom to have a shower.
I came out with my towel round my body, i wanted to change into a night wear, but i laid down on my
bed shedding tears, it was just like a routine.
I couldn’t sleep, i needed someone close to me at that moment. I called Kazeem’s number he didn’t
answer, i called again, and he picked up.
“Kiloshele (what’s happening)”, he asked me immediately he picked up.
“Nothing, just come please.”
He sighed, like he was relieved.
“Alright”, he said, and i hanged up immediately.
He knocked on the door, i told him to come in.
“What’s wrong?” He asked me.
Nothing, i said, and switched on the light.
“Are you sure?”
I sighed. I noticed his eyes were fixed on me, it was at that moment i realized that i was still on my short
towel round my body.
I’m sorry for disturbing you, you can go, i said, as i didn’t like the way he was looking at me.
“Why did you call me?” He asked.
I’m sorry, i wasn’t thinking straight, i said to him.
He came closer to me on the bed.
“You smell so sweet”, kazeem said.
I shifted back a bit.
Just stop it, i said.
He held me close to himself, kissing me forcefully.
I pushed him back with my strength.
” What is it?” He asked me, angrily.
“O my God! Why did i call him.”
“Stop all this”, Kazeem said.
Please, stop this please, i pleaded as i was shifting back on the bed.
He switched off the light, and came closer to me again. He forced my towel away from my body.
Kazeem, please stop this, please. Please, for God sake, stop this, i pleaded in tears, but his strength was
more than mine. Just stop this i am your cousin’s wife for God sake. Stop this.
“Shuuuuu”, he said.
Kazeem, still kept on forcing me, the more i was pleading.
“You are just so sweet” he said.
I screamed out loudly when i couldn’t stand it any longer, then he placed his hand on mouth to prevent
me from shouting. I was struggling with him, and crying.
I remembered a knife was close to the bed side, i stretched my hand to take the knife, i used the knife
to cut his arm, angrily.
“Haaaaa!” He screamed as he got up from me immediately, and he switched on the light he had put off
It was then i realized i cut him so deeply with the knife, his arm was bleeding profusely, blood was all
over the bed.
“God what have i done”, i became terrified.
” What the fucking hell! You cut me with a knife!” Kazeem yelled at me in a great anger.
Please, forgive me, i didn’t know what came over me, please.
“Oh Lord, what came over me? I asked myself, as tears were flowing down my face. I didn’t believe what
“You devil, blood sucker! Will you shut up that mouth of yours.”
Kazeem, jhor e ma bi nu. Please, forgive me it was a mistake”, i pleaded, crying and regretting what i did.
“I left important things and came all the way here to help your miserable life, and this is how you treat
me”, he said in great anger, holding his arm that was bleeding.
“Bitch! You will pay with your blood!”
He said, panting heavily in great anger.
I still kept on pleading, he walked away, i followed him, still pleading, telling him to allow me treat it.
“Don’t you dare! I mean don’t you dare follow me, unless i will kill you with my bare hands”, he said in
I became terrified the more, by his statement.
He left that night, with his arm that was still bleeding profusely.
I sat down on the chair in the living room, crying and regretting why i did that to him. I started to wish i
didn’t call him. His blood was all over the place, from the room, to the stairs, and down to the living
I cried in pains, regretting my action.
“It wasn’t his fault it’s mine, no man would see me with a short towel round my body, and won’t be
tempted to come to me”, i said in my mind, as i cried out.
I kept on calling his number, but he didn’t answer.
I was full with regrets, with pains in my heart.
The next day.
I still kept on calling his number, but he didn’t answer. I sent many text messages to him, but he didn’t
“I regret why i such to him. Oh God, please forgive me let Kazeem be healed.”
I was in the living room, crying in pains and regrets, when i heard the door open, i became scared, i got
up immediately in fear.
To be continued
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“Witch oooo! Killer! Killer! Devil, that’s who you are!” His mom yelled at me.
Tears flowed down my eyes.
“Why are you deceiving yourself with those fake tears of yours. You succeeded in killing my son, you
wanted to kill my own daughter also, if not that i took my grandson away you would have also killed
him, and just yesterday you wanted to kill my nephew, Kazeem, ehnn!” She yelled at the top of her
I…am… sorry, it was a mistake, Kazeem, tried to rape me, i said in tears.
“Will you shut up! You lair! There is no difference between you and the devil. You see, there is no peace
for the wicked one, no peace o! Today! I mean today, you are leaving my son’s house.”
My tears increased the more, i wished I had not harmed Kazeem.
“Wo le o! Ma waste time mi!”, (Enter o, don’t waste my time)She said. Immdiately, those three guys
who injured me on that day i came to her house, walked in.
I kept on pleading, explaining to her how it happened, but she didn’t listen to me.
She directed them to my room, they packed all my things carelessly and threw it outside the compound
on that day. I still kept on pleading, regretting what i did to Kazeem. I couldn’t stop crying.
“See blood everywhere! Aje ni yen, blood sucker, ha! O ma shey o! What a pity my son married a girl like
you!” She yelled.
Her statement hit my heart deeply, my tears increased the more.
“Mummy, o ti shey ton o”,( mummy, we are done o) one of the guys said to her.
“Shey, o sure ghon!” (Are you really sure).
“Beeni ma”, (yes ma), he replied her.
She went into the room to be sure they had packed out all that belonged to me.
“Good, very good”, she said, nodding her head as she walked down the stairs.
I came closer to her, pleading.
“Don’t beg me!”She yelled at me and pushed me.
“I can see you don’t want to understand”, she said to me.
“Now, pack her things and throw it outside the gate, immediately!” She yelled at the three guys. They
took to action immediately.
“Please ma, please. I’m sorry, i didn’t mean to that to Kazeem, it was a mistake. Please ma, Jhor, i have
no where to go”, i pleaded on my kneels, crying in pains.
“Lo si hell! (Go to hell!)”
I looked at her in surprise, crying.
“Yes! Go to hell! That’s where you belong to!”
I still kept on pleading.
“Good, now you are done, push this thing outside”, she said. She referred to him as “Thing.”
Immediately, one of the guys came closer to me, he was pulling me outside the gate, recklessly.I still
kept on pleading, in tears and pains.
“Take her out of here fast!” She yelled at the guy that was pulling me.
He pulled me out of the compound, and stood at the entrance of the gate. I sat on the ground crying in
“If Ibrahim, were to be alive all this won’t be happening to me. Lord, why did you take him away, Lord
why?. Kini mo shey, what did i do to deserve all this. Why is life treating me badly, my pains are just
increasing day by day. Now i am scared of what would happen next. Lord, why? Why? Why? Why
me ?……” I cried out.
She walked out with the two others guys. I went on my kneels pleading again, she looked at me and
hissed. She brought out a padlock and locked the gate.
“Je ma lo”, she said to the guys.
They opened the door of the car for her to enter, one sat at the back seat with her, two sat at the front.
The engine was started and they drove off immediately.
I sat on the ground again, crying in pains and regrets. I wished i had listened to my mom from the
beginning, but it was too late already.
“What a life is this, what a life. Where do i go from here? I don’t want to go to Joyce’s house, no, i don’t
want to put my problems on them. My house is on rent, where do i go to? Where do i pack my things
to?” I thought, crying.
Just then Stella walked closer to me, mocking me.
“(Laughing) hahahahaha, na you be this, abi no be you? I told you, you were going to see, when you and
that dead husband of yours treated me that way on that day. I’m Stella, no one dares me and goes free.
Enjoy your life the wise one, she said, laughing out loudly.
I looked at her in tears, i could’nt say a word, as she kept on mocking me before she left.
After a while of sitting and crying i got up. I took my bag that contained my ATM card and some money.
I stood crying, thinking how it will be, going back to my parent’s house. I place i had not been for years.
“No, no, i can’t go back”, I gave up, crying.
“Lord, please come to my rescue i have no where to go, Lord.”
I kept on thinking of where to go, i had no other place than my parents house.
I stood for a while, crying before i summoned on courage to move.
I boarded a cab at the bus-stop that came back to pack my things. When the driver was done packing my
things, i sat in front, he started the engine and drove off.
As he was driving, i kept on remembering my past life, i couldn’t hold back my tears.
In few hours, the driver arrived at my parents house.
He wanted to help me carrying my luggages in but i told him not to. I paid him, and he drove off.
I still couldn’t hold back my tears for a second, i was filled with so much pains in me.
I knocked on the gate in fear, i noticed the gate was open. I stood still for a while in fear, before i
summoned on courage to go in. I walked in, with fear in me. I was afraid of what my mom’s reaction
To be continued
© PRINCESS MOTUNRAYO DUROJAIYE
When i got in i saw my mom seated on the chair in the living room. She was surprised to see me.
After some few minutes i spoke.
Good evening, mummy, i greeted her.
“You are welcome o”, she said, still looking at me.
I sighed, and she sighed also.
“Sit down o”, she said.
I need to pack my things in, I said fearfully.
“Which things?” She asked seriously.
I kept mute.
“Which things did you say you want to pack in?”
My luagges, i said.
“Your luggage? What luggages?”
Mine, i replied her calmly.
“Ok, where did you say it is?” She asked.
Outside the gate.
“Let’s go”, she said.
She kept on looking at me as we walked quietly to the gate.
When she saw my luggages, she looked at me surprised. I bowed my face, looking down.
“What happened?” My mom asked me.
I couldn’t say a word to her, i was ashamed of myself.
“I hope it’s not what i am thinking o?” She asked, looking at me seriously.
I still kept mute.
“Come inside o, come.”
I stood still.
“I said come inside”, she said, as he held my arm and pulled me in.
“I just hope it’s not what i am thinking at all o, i just hope it’s not that.”
I still kept mute. My face bowed, almost in tears.
“What happened? Are you not the one i am talking to? Ehnn”, she asked angrily.
Tears began to flow down my face.
“Hmmmmmm, so he has now divorced you, ehnn”, she said, in a low tone.
“Are you not the one i am talking to, “, she said, angrily.
I couldn’t say a word, tears were just flowing down my face.
“So he had divorced you, now you are back to my house”,she said, angrily the more in a more in low
tone so people around won’t hear.
He…di…didn’t..div..orce..me… I managed to say, as i was crying.
“Shut up there! Who do you think you can decive? Me? Never!”
His…mom….sent….I couldn’t complete my statement, as i was crying in pains.
“I warned you, i warned you, i warned you, didn’t i? To you i was talking too much then. You went ahead
to get pregnant for him so you will be able to get married to him. Up to the extent you even did a
muslim marriage and you were still bold to invite me to come there, if not that i am your mother i
wouldnt have shown up at all on that day. “
As she was talking angrily i kept on crying, flashing back to my past life when my mom was warning me
then. I wished i had listened to her, i was full of regrets.
“I warned you as a mother, i talked and talked yet you still went on your own will.”
“Now, he has divorced you and you are lying to me here. Just look at yourself, see the shame you have
brought to yourself”, she said, with her eyes filled with tears. She was pained.
My pains and tears increased the more.
“Even after what happened to you, thank God, God saved your life. You left without me even knowing,
you changed your lines. I was so worried, we were all looking for you everywhere until we saw that
stupid latter you wrote down. I can see how you truly love him. I’m sure he has taken a muslim as his
wife now. Am sure you have learnt your lessons.”
Mommy….i …am… sorry. Please…, I pleaded as i was crying.
She kept mute with her hands folded on her chest, looking at me.
I went on my kneels, pleading.
Mommy, please i am sorry, i am sorry. Am sorry…..i pleaded, crying.
“There is no way i can allow you come back to my house. You disobeyed me even upon how i kept on
talking to you. You can’t bring shame to me here. Your father gave you a house, go there and stay.”
It’s on rent, i can’t go there. Mommy, please. I am sorry for not listening to you, it’s one of the biggest
mistake in life i am still regretting till now. Mommy, please forgive me. It was my fault. Please, forgive
me, i pleaded on my kneels, crying in pains and regrets.
My dad walked out, he was surprised to see me.
My mom told him everything, he sighed and shook his head in pity. He pleaded on my mom to let me
stay, that it wasn’t my fault, that i never knew it was going to happen that way.
“Didn’t i warn i? Didn’t i?” She said to my dad.
“When a mother is talking she has seen a lot o, a lot! Go back o, you are not staying here o!” She said to
I couldn’t stop crying as i was pleading on her to forgive me. My dad still kept on pleading on her to
“Are you not still the cause of what has happened also?” My mom said to my dad, angrily.
“Me?” My dad asked her.
“Yes you! When i was talking then, did you say anything to her?” She asked my dad.
“Don’t let my anger rise! You are not God to predict what will happen, what if she married someone else
and something worse had happened to her now. Don’t just annoy me”, he said angrily to my mom.
“Just look at yourself! Look at what you are saying. Foolish man.”
“Me foolish?” My dad said.
“Yes! Just look at what you are saying.”
They started yelling at each other, angrily.
I stood up, still crying.
Mommy… Please….I pleaded.
Before, i knew it they broke into a fight. I tried to separate them but i had no strength to. I had lost so
much strength, due to what i was passing through at that time. My two siblings were in school there was
no one to separate them. My mom was screaming as she and my dad were fighting. People ran into our
compound to separate them. Two men held my dad, two women held my mom, they were all pleading,
yet my mom and my dad were still throwing insults at each other.
I stood still crying.
“God why? Why? Why? Why all this happening, Lord. They are qurelling now just because of me, Lord
why? What kind of life is mine, Lord? Lord why are all this happening to me and you are allive watching
me. If Ibrahim were to be alive all this won’t be happening, and you took his life after he had given his
life to you, Lord why? Am i cursed?”
They still kept on throwing insults at each other. It was like they even forgot i was still there.
I couldn’t stand to watch my parent fight because of me. I walked outside the gate, i stood crying.
“Where do i start from? I am even scared of what is next to happen, because its glearing that my pains
are just meant to be increasing everyday”, i thought.
I still stood still thinking, and crying.
“Where do i begin from?” I asked myself as i raised one of my box that was on the floor.
I couldn’t stop crying.
To be continued
© PRINCESS MOTUNRAYO DUROJAIYE
I left my parents house on that day, November 12, 2018. I checked into an hotel. I paid for a week.
After all my luggages had been packed in, i sat on the bed crying and flashing back.
I flashed back……
To the day we first met. The day my mom sent him away. The day i saw him, when he pleaded and i
went to his house. The day we got married, when my mom wasn’t happy. The day we had Johnson. The
day robbers broke in and shot me. The day he brought Aliya in and i had to leave. The day he came back
begging. All what is mom did to me, an the day i saw him last.
I was filled with so much pains and tears.
I walked round the hotel room crying, looking at Ibrahim and Johnson’s picture on my phone.
“What a great mistake i made. If I knew mom i would have listened to you, i am sorry. Lord, have mercy
on me for not listening to my mom. Lord Jesus have mercy on me. I never knew religion was going to be
a big issue. I thought i will be able to fight trough, but i couldn’t, i lost it. Now, i can’t even get to see my
son. Ibrahim, why did you have to leave me why? Why did death have to take you away from me, why?”
I said in my mind, as i cried out bitterly in pains.
You know that moment when you are filled with so much pains and regrets and you wish you could just
change back the hands of time, that was the way i was feeling. I wished i could rectify my mistakes, i
wished i could change things .
I had no one to turn to. Ibrahim i had was gone, my mom didn’t accept me back, and i didn’t want to
disturb Joyce and Abel with my problems, they had theirs they were facing also. There was no one to
console me, only me to myself.
In the evening, i ordered for food and it was brought to me, but i couldn’t eat. I laid down on the bed,
still crying in regrets and in pains.
Do you know the kind of pains i was feeling, who i loved with all of me was gone, my son was taken
away, i couldn’t see him. Ibrahim’s mom sent me away, even my own mother didn’t accept me back. I
didn’t even know where to begin from again.
“Commit suicide, commit suicide”, my mind kept on telling me.
“Fight, don’t give up. Fight till you win and get back your son”, another part of me was telling me.
“Even though i get my son back, i can never still be happy because Ibrahim is gone”, i said in my mind, as
i was crying.
I couldn’t stop crying everyday.
Two weeks later, when i noticed i had spent a lot paying for the hotel room, i decided go in search for an
I got out of the hotel after two weeks, to go search for an agent.
I had to trek as i had no car, my cars were in Ibrahim’s house, his mom had locked up.
After a while of searching, i remembered i still had the agent number that brought those couple to rent
my house. I took my phone and dialed his number, i told him i was in search of a self contain. I told him
the area in Lagos i wanted, he told me he would get back to me. I stopped a bike that took me back to
Two days later, he told me he had found one. I went there to see the apartment and i paid for it
That night i laid down on my bed crying.
“I have to be strong now, i have to be”, i kept on telling myself, as i kept on crying, still in pains.
The next morning, i set out to leave.
“It’s time to be strong”, i said to myself, as tears rolled down my face.
Tears couldn’t stop rolling down my face, as i was rolling my boxes out of the hotel room.
To be continued
© PRINCESS MOTUNRAYO DUROJAIYE
When i got to the apartment, i got someone to clean the apartment, before my luggages were packed in
by the help of a neighbor.
I sat down on the floor in the house, crying.
Days kept on going and going, i still couldn’t be myself, i couldn’t be strong.
I still missed Ibrahim and Johnson so much.
Life couldn’t just be the same again, no matter how hard i tried.
I didn’t stop praying for God to touch her heart to bring back my son.
To cut my long story short……
As the year 2018, was running to an end i made up my mind to be strong, and start all over again.
Jan 11 2019, was when i resumed going back to my boutique.
One afternoon, i was in my boutique. I was sitting, when a lady and guy were selecting what they
wanted to get.
“Baby, this shoe is lovely, get it”, the guy said, to the lady.
My mind flashed back to Ibrahim,how he used to call me ‘baby’. I flashed back to the times we do go out
together to have fun, tears rolled down my eyes, i felt the pains again.
One evening, i got home my mind flashed to Bayo, i decided to call him.
It rang at first he didn’t pick up, the second time he did. I got his number from where i wrote it in my
dairy after deleting it.
Bayo: Good evening. You remembered me today, that’s nice.
Me: Yeah, when you never bothered to call to know how i am doing.
Bayo: Please, don’t make me feel like a bad person. You know why, you understand.
Me: it’s okay.
Bayo: Yeah, you know what let me call you back now.
Me: Don’t worry.
He hanged up and called me back.
Bayo: How are you doing? How is your husband and your son?
Me: Fine, what about you also?
Bayo: I’m good by the grace of God.
Bayo: I am sorry for not calling to check on you for a long time, but i want you to know that you will
forever remain one of the most important person in my life after my mom. I tell people about you. You
saved my life, i am still grateful and i will forever be.
(Tears rolled down my eyes the more.)
Bayo: Hello, hello…Are you there?
Me: Yeah, i am.
Bayo: hmmm, alright.
Me: forgive me for all that happened then, i am sorry.
Bayo: No, no, dear. You didn’t hurt me ok. God made things to me happen that way and, i am happy it
all turned around to be good for both of us. I’m happy you got back to your husband and, am also happy
you saved my life.
(I sighed, as i flashed back to the good time Bayo and i shared together. My tears couldn’t stop flowing
down my face.)
Me: Yeah, thank God too.
Bayo: Yeah, glory be to God. I’m also happy you called at the right time.
Bayo: Yes, i have a great news.
Me: Tell me.
Bayo: I will be getting married on the 19 of January, next week.
Me: Wow, really?
Me: Wow, i am so happy for you, Bayo.
Bayo: Yeah, all glory to God. If you can make it i will be so happy.
Me: Where is the wedding taking place?
Bayo: Here in lekki. I will send the venue to you via WhatsApp.
Me: Alright, i will be there. I am happy for you.
Bayo: Yeah, thanks. I can’t wait to see you there.
Me: I will be there.
Bayo: I’m expecting you?
Bayo: My wife to be is here, would you love to speak to her?
Me: Wow, yeah.
I spoke to her on the phone. She was so nice. She thanked me for saving Bayo’s life. We talked for a
while before she gave the phone to Bayo.
Bayo: What about my boy , Johnson? Let me speak to him na?
Me: hmmmmm, he isn’t here now. He is with with grandparents.
Bayo: Oh! It will be good if you can come with him, o.
Me: I may.
Bayo: Not you may o, you must.
Me: Alright o.
Bayo: Yes o.
Bayo: Okay na. Take very good care of yourself and, keep on looking beautiful.
Me: Thanks, you too.
Bayo: Yeah, bye now.
He hanged up.
I laid down crying.
Jan 19, 2019, i attended Bayo’s weeding. The weeding was a great one. His wife is a beautiful lady.
Younger than i am, in her early 20s, like 23 or 24.
After the wedding, i met with he and his wife. They appreciated me for coming. Bayo, asked me about
my husband . He also asked me why i didn’t bring Johnson. I forced a wide smile on my face, and told
him we will talk later, he said ok. He thanked me again for saving his life and, he hugged me happily.
When i got home that day, i sat on the floor crying. I took my phone, looking at Ibrahim’s picture. My
pains increased the more.
Ibrahim, i miss you so much. I miss you, Ibrahim, i said, as i was crying.
To cut my story short ……
February 2, 2019.
I was in my boutique, i was feeling so dizzy so i decided to go home.
As i stepped out, i saw what shocked me.
Jesus!!!!!…….. I screamed out loudly.
I started shevring.
Blood of Jesus! Don’t come closer to me, i said to the man that was walking closer to me.
“Am i dead” , i thought to myself, in fear
I couldn’t believe who my eyes were seeing in front of me.
MY PAINS Part 85
To be continued
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