SARÉ by Olowojesiku Deborah Iyanu
Episode 3
I drew myself closer wanting him to cuddle me but he pushed me away and asked me to leave his room.
Papa: Why are you not remorseful? We did what we shouldn’t have done and you are still bringing your naked body closer to me? Oh my God, I don’t know how I fell for this, I have been celibate for over eight years.
Me: Are you now trying to blame me? You should have rejected it if you weren’t interested in the first place.
Papa: It’s fine, I am sorry. I take all the blame, the Holy Spirit warned me about collecting food from my sisters but I failed to listen. Now, see what I have done to myself, just a few minutes of pleasure has made me lose the spiritual gifts I prayed for years to acquire. Please, you need to leave.
Me: I am not leaving, I love you and want to be your wife. Why do you think I gave you my virginity? It’s because I want to be the only woman in your life.
Papa: If you don’t leave here now, I will call Pastor Adegbola and tell him what transpired between us.
Me: Fine! I will leave but will be back. You belong to me.
I put on my clothes slowly while Papa backed me. While I dressed, he was still crying. I stepped out of the room but stood at his doorstep to hear what would happen next or who he would call. I was there for almost twenty minutes and all I could hear was Papa’s sobs. I silent my conscience with the fact that he enjoyed it and then went back to my hostel.
I didn’t feel remorseful probably because I felt sleeping with him has made him mine. Then, I noticed that he was avoiding me, whenever I go to his office, his vice will always tell me that he isn’t in the mood to attend to anyone. To make things worse, I began to crave sex badly, I didn’t sleep with another man in order not to give Papa the excuse to get married to another woman. I tried everything possible to get Papa’s attention but it didn’t work, I tried going to his house only to discover that his Vice had moved in with him, Papa went as far as stopping the mentorship class, so, we all saw less of him in the fellowship. His Vice was the one running the fellowship.
When I couldn’t get Papa to satisfy my sexual urge, I began to threaten him. I threatened to report to the fellowship authority, I was even ready to tell anyone who cared to listen that he molested me. That threat got Papa, he sent for me immediately which made me happy but when I got to his office that particular afternoon, I met him and his Vice in his office. He told me that his Vice and spiritual parents are aware of the situation, the only thing he hasn’t done was to report to the fellowship authorities which he said he would do very soon. He stopped acting as the Papa of the fellowship because he was concerned about reuniting with God. Those words broke me.
That day, my eyes were opened to the evil I had done. Even though he had his own mistakes, I knew I brought a general down, I knew I pushed a man of God into committing immorality. He went on to advise me to go to God for forgiveness before it was too late, he ended his speech with the fact that he couldn’t marry me because God had already revealed his wife to him before all of that happened. That last statement touched me, it was like hot coal was placed on my palm. I went mad, I told him he wouldn’t marry any other lady except me, and I told him to return my virginity if he wouldn’t be getting married to me. Guess what Papa did, he went on his knees begging me to forgive him, I looked at him and saw that he was already in tears, my eyes went to his Vice and I saw tears falling from his eyes too. I could have handled things in a better way but it was as if I was being controlled by a demon.
Some months later, I discovered that I was pregnant, I was so happy because I felt I could use that to make Papa get married to me. I sent him a message alongside the pregnancy test results so that he wouldn’t think I was telling him lies. I went on to tell him to do the needful. Instead of him calling me, I received calls from the fellowship authorities inviting me to a meeting, I knew Papa had finally informed them. Getting to the meeting, I was shocked to see my parent, Papa’s parent, some pastors, and past Presidents of the fellowship.
I sensed Papa had prayed to God to work on me because my disappointed self wanted to tell them that he raped me when I went to give him food in his room but I found myself saying the truth. Heaven knows I was so disappointed, involving my parent was out of it, you should have seen the disappointment all over their face. Papa’s mother told them not to be harsh on me because she blamed her son, she drew me nearer and told me Papa would marry me. At first, I was happy but my mom informed everyone that I won’t be getting married to Papa. After their discussion, they concluded that I carried the pregnancy to full term while Papa was to take total responsibility. After the birth of the child, I was told to decide whether to give the child to Papa’s family so that I would be able to continue my education since the school won’t allow a pregnant student in the school.
Seeing that the conclusion didn’t favor me, I told everyone that I would prefer to go for an abortion. The next thing that followed was a slap from my mom, my parent couldn’t believe my level of exposure. My mom promised everyone that I would carry the pregnancy to full term and when the baby was born, both families would decide what to do. Gosh! I was just so unhappy but then, there was nothing I could do. I had to pack my things and stay with my parent all through the pregnancy period while the fellowship authority decided to help defer my admission.
Papa kept apologizing to my parent for defiling me but my parents held nothing against him since I was the one that went to his room that night.
To be continued.
